Bear Cave Lockdown 🔒🐻

Nobody, not even a stuffed bear under cave lockdown, will get through this coronavirus ordeal unscathed. As I witness the markets tank for a second time in a little over a decade, an event punctuated by the electoral slaughter of Mousie's favourite presidential candidate, I brood over lost funding for Mousie’s creative “pawjects” and my interplanetary escape plan––my two hopes of salvation in and from this world.

Bitcoin hedges have done nothing to mitigate damage to my bottom line. If I’d actually paid for the cave we live in, I’d at least hold some real estate of value. What’s worse, Mousie has once again entrusted me with putting her ‘found object’ coin collection to ‘good work’. I was therefore obliged to get her up to speed on recent market events, once she finally awoke from her 'critter rest catchup', which took an entire day… underscoring the counterproductive practice of messing with a mouse’s sleep schedule in the name of daylight ‘saving' time.

Per usual, Mousie’s eyes glazed over during my detailed news summary, but abruptly widened at my mention of “coronaVIRUS.” As a little buddy guardian, even the slightest allusion to “sick germs*” is sufficient to launch Mousie into full panic mode.

*Sick germs: a Mousieillogical term denoting contagious illness which makes one ponder whether germs themselves can become ‘ill’.

Upon reflection, I regret that I may be unwittingly responsible for Mousie’s germophobia––in this dystopian age of ours, ‘storytimes’ with Mousie have inevitably included alarming magazine articles on society’s vulnerability to pandemic. Such storytime sessions have prompted Mousie requests for supplemental readings from our ‘Symptoms’ medical encyclopedia, followed by Bear guided internet “researches” for holistic natural ‘cures’... requests which I have regrettably facilitated. 🐻🙄

Relentless coronavirus media coverage, and the current administration’s demonstrable lack of competence to effectively manage the pandemic at hand, haven’t exactly helped alleviate ‘mousesterics’, nor has Mousie’s instinctive awareness that critter lives cannot be entrusted to a “man with a cat on his head.”

"The Man with the Cat on his Head" by Mousie, 2020. Crayon on sketch paper.

When I encountered masked little buddies, enclosed in individual glass terrariums awaiting inoculation, I could see it was time to address the misconceptions and panic contaminating our cave space.

After a heart-to-heart talk with Mousie about appropriate times to wear different ‘types’ of masks, and some contemplation about the value of life ‘quantity’ vs life ‘quality’, we agreed that transforming little ones into masked “bubble buddies” was not optimal to their well-being. Mousie added that outdoor play under rainbows and sunshine in refreshing outside breezes would likely bring greater levels of “joy to their hearts.”

I went on to reassure Mousie that so long as we don’t stray far from our HEPA-filtered cave, which we rarely do anyhow, drastic action should not be necessary, particularly for stuffed, non-biological critters impervious to viral infection. Still, after recent news about a 'sneezing' Betelgeuse, Mousie was not ready to let her guard down completely.

Beverages bearing names of respiratory illness have also been a source of confusion for Mousie. I have therefore needed to dispel concerns about their safety for human consumption.

To avoid infecting “human friends,” Mousie has continued to take intense, though more measured precautions to do her part in getting humanity through this challenging time, safe and sound. We’re now under cave lockdown, and Mousie’s suited up to regularly scour germ prone areas, refreshen little buddies via Teddy Yeti’s signature hygiene routine, and gently cleanse sticky buddy paws with a washcloth.

Maintaining contact with her community has been equally vital to Mousie. She’s therefore substituted hypersocial in-mouse gatherings with online watch parties, featuring Youtube screenings of A Mass for Shut-Ins. When asked to set up online chat and video streaming for all the mouse friends, I queried whether such extensive critter contact would make me a weak link in our quarantine lockdown. Mousie reminded me of claims I had made about the unlikelihood of stuffed critter to critter transmission, then, after a brief hesitation, asked that I sanitize my paws between IT jobs, because healthy stuffies may still be "sick germ carriers"... Cave lockdown was then extended to a minimum term of nine days.

As the week wears on, the acute hysteria that descended so abruptly over our cave is showing signs of lifting. This morning, Mousie even managed to find a silver lining in all this: a lesson about interconnectivity, and a distinct possibility of impacting every other earthly being through a “loving flutterfly effect.” Mousie went on to ponder other ‘soft’ phenomena, including the ebb and flow of “the Yin and Yang,” reminding me that bear markets also eventually turn around. I guess I’ll just try to stay ‘positive’.

As Mousie now muses on the infectious potential of love, she requests that I add the following message to conclude today’s blog entry: “May the power of love spread more rapidly than the coronavirus!” 😐 While I sometimes wonder about Mousie’s suitability to author greeting cards, (one of her side aspirations) I always find hope in her loving intentions. 🍻🐻